Funny things, Tarot cards. I’ve owned a deck for twenty odd years, inspired to get some after a slightly spooky encounter with a man who read my cards on the Spanish Steps in Rome. I skirt round them. Ever present in a corner of my room, tucked away with a box of old diaries and the possessions tied to my most emotional memories – the identity bracelets from two newborn babies, the old key to my Mum’s house, the cheap chunky beads I wore on a thousand glorious student club nights.
I didn’t touch them for over thirteen years. In late 2003, I did a reading which I didn’t understand at all, and put them away. Several months later, after a positive pregnancy test, I had an ‘oh yeah’ moment of clarity about the meaning of all those pictures of women with children the cards had turned up. But by then I was too far along the road to Mothercare World, real vs disposable nappies, bottle vs breast, purées vs baby-led weaning etc to be bothered with ethereal stuff like Tarot cards. So they stayed in their box for over a decade.
Just lately though… I’ve been dabbling. Late at night when the house is quiet and my head is buzzing. After so many years of hard-bitten cynicism I feel almost self-conscious admitting doing something so … well.. flaky. It’s like, can this really be me doing this?
It’s not like I’m trying to predict the future, seeing what the cards have in store for me. I don’t necessarily think there’s anything supernatural or other-worldly about them. What level they work on, I don’t quite know. But there’s something. The mother and child pictures just before I found out I was pregnant. The rainbow turned up by a friend who’s debating when to come out. The Hierophant, a card which twenty years ago would crop up in the future position in my tarot spread, now appears to represent something that’s holding me back. And the fact that in all my readings, I’ve never once turned up even a single pentacle. Money and me, like trying to push the north poles of a pair of magnets together.
Do we unconsciously select the cards which have a message for us? Or do the cards’ archetypal images just trigger associations in our minds, to which we assign our own meanings and interpretations? Who knows? Psychology is a young science. We still don’t completely understand how human brains work. All I know is that they give me food for thought, a few minutes of calm reflection, and occasionally they point a way forward.
Written for Stream of Consciousness Saturday hosted by Linda G. Hill. This week’s prompt was a word beginning or ending with dom. If you’d like to take part the rules, borrowed from Linda’s site, are as follows:
1. Your post must be stream of consciousness writing, meaning no editing, (typos can be fixed) and minimal planning on what you’re going to write.
2. Your post can be as long or as short as you want it to be. One sentence – one thousand words. Fact, fiction, poetry – it doesn’t matter. Just let the words carry you along until you’re ready to stop.
3. There will be a prompt every week. I will post the prompt here on my blog on Friday, along with a reminder for you to join in. The prompt will be one random thing, but it will not be a subject. For instance, I will not say “Write about dogs”; the prompt will be more like, “Make your first sentence a question,” “Begin with the word ‘The’,” or simply a single word to get your started.
4. Ping back! It’s important, so that I and other people can come and read your post! For example, in your post you can write “This post is part of SoCS:” and then copy and paste the URL found in your address bar at the top of this post into yours. Your link will show up in my comments for everyone to see. The most recent pingbacks will be found at the top. NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, such as Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below.
5. Read at least one other person’s blog who has linked back their post. Even better, read everyone’s! If you’re the first person to link back, you can check back later, or go to the previous week, by following my category, “Stream of Consciousness Saturday,” which you’ll find right below the “Like” button on my post.
6. Copy and paste the rules (if you’d like to) in your post. The more people who join in, the more new bloggers you’ll meet and the bigger your community will get!
7. As a suggestion, tag your post “SoCS” and/or “#SoCS” for more exposure and more views.
8. Have fun!